


Warden-Commander

by panpanpanda



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Happy to Sad, Night thinking, Sad, The brain messes you up, Warden Mission, fluff?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-20
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2018-03-18 18:54:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3580260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/panpanpanda/pseuds/panpanpanda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tabris lays awake at night. Her mission had brought her far away from what she loves. Thinking about old memories stir something inside.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Warden-Commander

**Author's Note:**

> Mistress Tabris

Tabris laid down on her cot. It was not comfortable, in fact it was cold, rigid and so very close to becoming damp, she did camp inside a cave after all. Though, despite the discomfort, something about the smell and the sensation – the grit of the ground against her fingers and the caves insatiable humidity – filled her with nostalgia.  She chuckled at the thought, thinking that it was silly of her to want to reach out back to the days when even though the world was falling apart, she had…

She sighed, letting out the deep breath before rolling to her side.

Before she was the Warden Commander, Tabris had her friends, there was banter, the noise of Bodahn and Sandal’s cart being pulled along, there was annoyance, irritation, and headaches as the wooden wheels against the uneven roads drowned out all other noise which in turn had everyone to raise their voices to hear each other. There was laughter, and most of all – Tabris had to turn as she felt a slight tickle in her nose, and her chest tighten – most of all there was love.

Love came in all sorts of forms, love came in the form of a shrewd beauty; one that would tease and make snide remarks, yet there was a kindling kindness and Maker or Creators take her if she knew anyone found out.

Love came as fire, red-hot and dangerous but fills you with warmth. A remarkable voice, and a talent for words that could take you away, and for a moment, forget who you are as you get lost in her tales.

Love came with the same pointed ears. Sharp blades that lacked in precision. That form of love, taught her to keep trying, keep moving, and trust who you are and what you can do.  It taught her that there was always a way.

Love was a small, burly dwarf. Rooted to the ground, immovable but with a personality so light, it feels that even if something was to go wrong, it would be okay. Sometimes Love was big and strong, protective, with a surprise of a soft centre that was impossible not to poke. Love was motherly, caring and caressing, a hard to find kindness.  Love can even be found in the toughest of all creation, permeating through stone and metal. Sometimes, Love was something you cannot understand but it knows you, and in kind, you know it as well. That Love was loyal, throughout the end.

However, her favourite type of Love was in the form of an awkward charm. Reluctant yet eager at the same time. Falling in love with Alistair was something she did not expect, then again how could she? She was not exactly looking for love considering the event that took place not even a day before her recruitment. Perhaps… she laid on her back to look up at what she believed might have been the cave ceiling seeing that it was dark, or lack of seeing for it was dark. Icy breeze entered the cave earning a light shiver from the elf. Perhaps that was the reason Alistair had become so special to her. An affection that slowly built itself on trust and dependence. He became her anchor, something to pull her back to reality.

No?

Now that she thought back on it, she was very much not as dependent on Alistair as he was to her.

No, they were one another’s pillars.

She chuckled.

Whatever their roles were to each other, it became important. It became a solid bond between the two.

 **Oh Alistair.**  

Years. It has been years since they last saw each other. It was not even on the day that she had left 

_The King has Orlesian dignitaries in audience, Mistress Tabris._

_Mistress Tabris_ , she thought as she rubbed her a shoulder lightly to warm it from the cold, recalling how loud the King’s guards had said those words.

A title that regards a woman of high stature, as the textbook definition goes, after all she was both the Arlessa of their Alienage and Amaranthine. Though somehow, something was clawing violently inside and she could not help but feel that they had meant it by its other description.

 **The King’s slut.**  

_It is imperative. Please let the King Alistair know. I will be waiting._

_We are afraid that this will take a long while, Mistress Tabris.  Queen Anora had explicitly instructed that King Alistair is not to have any visitors today._

_Just …. If the King finishes his appointment or has time to spare… Just please let him know that I am waiting. It is of utmost importance._

Tabris pulled an arm over her eyes, inhaling the chilled breeze as heat crept up her cheeks.  Heavy breathes created mist that escaped her lips. Perhaps, this was the reason she never laid in bed before sleep came to claim her, the reason she would work so hard until she was utterly spent to even find proper lodgings, the reason why she chose to not have any sort of comfort, the reason she would rather listen to the calling, befriending the song, getting to know it’s ragged rhythm until it she thought of it as a melody than think about her life from before. 

The way the mind worked baffled her. Remembering only the good before it follows the trail to the bad.

Feelings, memories stampeded through her mind. Was she angry? Glad? Regretful?  Pathetic.  What good will this do? It was no use to be like this, she would not benefit from recalling fond, old memories. They would be safer locked away in a casket, buried deep within her heart.

Tabris willed herself calm, letting the arm drop unceremoniously to the stone floor and tells herself like she had before time and again:

“Lock away all feeling and face the facts” 

Alistair never came.

Her friends are gone.

She is alone

She has a duty to the Wardens. She belonged to the Order. 

She needs to find the cure to the calling and to save all the Wardens

She is Warden-Commander Tabris.


End file.
